To the Choirmaster

This is a poem that is loosely based on Psalm 51, the psalm David wrote after he was confronted by Nathan about committing adultery with Bathsheba, intentionally causing her husband’s death, and then marrying her. In America, statistics tell us that it is very rare to meet a young man (or increasingly, young woman) who has not, at some point in his life, been addicted to pornography and masturbation. The statistics are about equal inside and outside of the Church. If you fall under that category, I urge you to tell someone you trust. With tears in my eyes as I type this, I tell you that there is truly grace enough to redeem your sin and shame into a powerful work for Christ. A life-changing book that I recommend walking through with two or three other brothers is Sexual Sanity for Men.


To the choirmaster. A psalm of young men, when Christ the Lord went to us, after we became addicted to pornography.

 

shame and failure
are my bones

i cannot move
i cannot cry

i am empty
staring at nothing

your comforts are ash
your music is death

your happiness is alien
your love is not here

my brothers are daggers
to my spirit

i put them far from me
i cower in blackness

do not draw near
for you are holy

lord why do i try
i am always enticed

i want to be free
i want to be love

but i am enticed
i am enticed

i resolve to stand firm
i resolve and i do not change

i want to be free
i want to be love

but i am enticed
i am enticed

i confess and i weep
i confess and i do not change

i want to be free
i want to be love

but i am enticed
i am enticed

i beg for your life
i beg and i do not change

i want to be free
i want to be love

despair is my home
where are you lord

Jesus smile on me
At the close of day

I will trust in You
I will trust Your promises

Set my heart upright
Bind my soul to You

Restore to me again
The joy of Your salvation

Strengthen Your Church
With the power of Your Spirit

Lift high Your name
Let Your name be praised

Then Your servant will know peace
Then Your child will laugh

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s