Longing for Heaven

I wrote this little poem a while back. It is sort of a mix between a supplication, a confession, and a commitment. It should probably have more of the hope of the Gospel at the end, rather than a self-assured statement of my own. Anyways. Verses I drew from are Luke 22:39-46, Matthew 25:31-46, 1 Timothy 1:12-17, and psalms such as Psalm 38. I hope it makes some sense.

Is it strange to scream silently?
Is it strange to yearn violently?
Is it strange to sweat drops of blood?

Yes. It is strange.
I resent the force of people,
Pulling, clawing, needing me.
But you, least of these, I will not forsake.

Can there be a peace in torment?
How can I have peace in sin?
The peace I want I do not have always,
But others have a peace in sin.
Do they not feel the weight?

Even now, is it pride?
I do not believe I am the worst,
How can I not?

Is it strange to yearn violently?
Yes, it is strange.
But you, Lord, I cannot forsake.

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